This is easily the best picture of my deployment.

Ladies and gents, Ben the Brit, and a high five, like an American. Jax would not approve...

This picture preeeetty much captures all the Ben the Brit is. The hair, in particular. Ben is gone now, and his replacement has much better hair. She's cool.

I think this is the first time the title of this thing had anything to do with anything in the post in at least a month...

I'm reading Time Enough for Love now. Haaaahahaha the quotes. Awesome.

We found cheese. Real, good cheese. I'm doomed. omnomnomnom.

I broke down. Someone is getting me smaller pants. I was compared to a "starbellied sneetch" (and oh the JUDGEMENT for not getting that reference) and someone was going to BAF anyway and offered. We'll see if the new ones fit come Wednesday.

Homework update: Methodology, done. Now. I have to fix it. Sigh. And write 40 more pages. I'm really trying to remember why I decided to do this. I'm not gonna lie, this is the first time I've gotten so much pushback from a teacher since my mom tried to teach me calculus (sorry mom...). However, it's just so hard for me to take seriously.

Dear other person at CF: If you have time enough to think you can count my reps, you should probably be working harder. Piss off.

This picture wasn't even my idea.

hey, sitting on rocks for 2 hours waiting after an IDF gets boring.

and you knew it was gonna happen eventually anyway.

When I left my small group gave me a daily devotional, Streams in the Desert, which outside of the name has been quite applicable. Not even just with the little things here, but the ongoing, overarching things which cause me pain or impatience or that I want. It's good, the devos are pointed and short, and pack a punch in exactly a way that convicts me. It's so hard tho, to apply that here. Being here amplifies the biggest things I struggle with at home and at the same time makes it easier to try to avoid the reality of it by throwing yourself into routine and holding on the the people here who help you stay sane.

This just in!

I just got more mangos in the mail. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

I may have a problem.

Also, caramel apple candy corn, that's a thing. Oh boy. Must be good...must be good...

I didn't learn anything worth knowing this week. I learned that a co-worker and I are never going to be able to work together and I've flipped the switch and drained out all my give-a-damn. But that's not really worth knowing, it's just lousy.

I'm going to go eat some mangos now...like, all of them. Maybe.

love ya!

-S.

 



mornin' sunshine!

Welcome to Monday!  I really want to treat Monday like the end of the week and I’m almost there.  But this one defiantly feels like the start of the week.

I'm not really one for countdowns, and I'm not counting this deployment down in the least. However I did realize this week that I hit the halfway point, and that's neat right?

I got a mini-care package this week :) Mini lightsabres and a mini-etch-a-sketch. There will be an epic duel at some point I'm sure. I'll take pictures.

I was so antsy today that I couldn't sit at my desk. I went to the gym - during work - which for me is not a thing.  And I have roughly 2 more hours and I still don't want to be sitting and I'm constantly tapping on my desk with my fingers. rwar.

In other news, Vitamin C is awesome. Not awesome is the concept of medical facilities on base not being open on Saturday. So because it was the only thing open when someone found me curled up trying to wait out the pain, I went to the ER on Saturday. I'm fine. They gave me painkillers and I didn't eat for like a day or work out for two and I'm good now. Not sure exactly what it was, as the nice doctor was very quiet and very French, but she gave me more painkillers to take home and I survived. I've been told by a very insistent friend that I was dehydrated (I swear I was not) and the same friend then proceeded to ask me about 9 times the next day if I was drinking water, mostly to make fun of me. I was not dehydrated, I promise. I'm clueless sometimes but I think certain people have cured me of the not drinking water thing.  ahem.

I got a real-life project. I don't remember if I mentioned it last time. I'm planning a conference! Don't question the holding of conferences in the middle of Afghanistan it will just make your head hurt. Plus it gives me something of the planning/organizing/doing anything but just sitting here variety to work on, which is cool. The new Brit Wing Commander wants to be a little more formal about it all than I do, but that's ok. Yay projects!

And for you old folks out there, I taught one of my friends how to facetime this week. And how to close out the apps running in the background, which may or may not have been the reason her battery life tanked...

Online shopping is a trap, A TRAP I TELL YOU. One I have mostly avoided falling prey to. Mostly. The jacket is really cute and it has elbow patches soIdon'twanttohearaboutit. Others, however, despite good intentions, have been in Afghanistan too long. Yes, the hot pink mini shorts looked cute on the model. But the model is built like a 12 year old and not like a fitness model. SO. Once they arrived tho they had to be tried on and my goodness. We decided they were a bit hookerish.  A bit being, a lot.  Which in our generally tired and depressingly under-entertained state, became a thing we had to take farther of course. Items of clothing which are perfectly cute when taken separately or paired correctly become OPERATION COLUMBIAN HOOKER when combined in the most wrong ways. It was awesomely hilarious. We're working on version 2.0, and pictures may or may not be provided. My official position in this Op is photographer, for obvious reasons.

I get to go on a field trip! Well, that's the plan anyway. Next month I should get to go to the US Embassy in Kabul to meet with and talk to young ANSF female officers, for a mentoring/learning sort of event. I'm looking forward to it because 1) Field trip. 2) I bet it's going to be fascinating hearing their perspectives. 3) I want to see the Embassy. 4) Something else to do and it'll be a good bullet on my evaluation when I leave. Thinking this doesn't make me a bad person, btw. I need bullets, and it's the truth. But anyway, yay! I'll let you know how it goes.

This doesn't really have to do with anything.  It means 1) I was reminded this week how truly awesome The Gilmore Girls was and 2) I'm lonely, dangit.  It's my blog, I will post what I want.

 

--Break--

THIS JUST IN: If you have a 24/7 watch desk, other unit on base, why are you expecting ANOTHER watch desk (read: me) to call said first mentioned watch desk to notify them of things?  Isn't that like...their job? No?

Whatever.

--Break--

What I learned this week:

- 30 min can make a huge difference in sleep schedule. Starting a workout at 2230 instead of 2200 had me on my ass after 3 days. I think the boys noticed and were kind enough to move it back...

- sleep+nyquil = glorious. GLORIOUS.

- There was a lot of capitalization going on this week. But you know I wasn't yelling, so it's cool.

- We're at the point again where I should be doing homework, and I probably will in like 2 days but I have no interest in it just now. Zero.

- I'm still super paranoid about getting in people's way and becoming a nuisance.

Peace out y'all.

-S.

You know what I want? A really good waffle.

September 11th was this past week, so I'll just get this bit out of the way now:

It was just another day.

That sounds harsh, I suppose, when I say it like that. It's not that I'll ever forget the event or the aftermath, but I did, more than once, forget what day it was. I only remembered when someone else brought it up. Because I came to work, I did my job, I talked to my family and joked with friends, I worked out, I went to sleep. Just another day.  A day how it should be.

--break--

I also did homework. Source formatting is awful. But I finished my LitReview. And then my teacher extended the deadline for an assignment...after it was due. So there's that.

Someone left a thank you note and candy on my desk and I still have no idea who or why. I am so confused. Some of my friends have decided I have a bf, but I feeeeel like I would know about that. I should have at least gotten a vote, and possibly veto power.

It's starting to cool off here, which is sweet. Hopefully it will kill all the mosquitoes, the little brats. I'm also told it's going to rain a lot more. So I'm going to go get an umbrella.

2lbs of dried mangos last me less than a week, and that's terrifying.

Also, facebook group chats are a great invention, particularly for geographically distant friends.

I found/was given a real long-term project, woohoo!  Planning a conference. Winning the war right here, people.

Side note: Army COLs should probably not try to tell me how the ISRD should do asset allocation, especially when he wants us to guess when something is going to happen. Erm...no. That's...that's not how it works. I can't.

The rest of the week was pretty standard, a going away, some cards, some hanging out in a bunker, some sleeping, some working out. It's sorta boring to write about at this point. But my weekly update to let you know I'm alive and well is complete, and I'm goign to go check mail now.  Here's a picture for your further entertainment.

My basic job description.

much love,

-S.

I am absolutely stalling on homework by writting this post.

There is no structure to the post this week, and it's random and jumpy. There are several quotes of the week this week.  You're welcome.

"-YOU + ME + DINSEY + SUPERBOWL PARTY WHEN THE BRONCOS WIN IT

-SOLD TO THE GIRL IN THE FABULOUS MONOCLE AND FEDORA!"

On my apology for not having time to finish a random long term work project (for legit my-real-job reasons): "Oh no, you're doing this out of the kindness of your heart and a complete unwillingness to sit and do nothing all day." Yeaaaah pretty much.

On that same day...."Gah. Sarah stop doing work and pay attention to usssss! Priorities!"

"If we don't get arrested doing this, I'm going to be severely disappointed."

Allow me to explain that last one. This week we had a special visitor, Bananas the Monkey, who will eventually live somewhere in Iowa with a bunch of kids. Think Flat Stanley but more 3-D and he got to ride in a U-2. Ben the Brit and I ran around base taking pictures and generally looking silly. Ben the Brit was not a fan of the silly bit. His least favorite part was when I handed him back the stuffed animal in front of a bunch of other Brits. I on the other hand, have no shame about carting around a stuffed monkey all over base. I ride a scooter, I mean really.

Anyway, back to the point.

The giant sign that says "Welcome to Kabul" is on the flight line...which neither Ben the Brit nor I have actual access to. And when we did find someone to get us there, we did get asked what the heck we were doing. I may or may not have attracted attention by jumping to try to get the thing on top of a door. ahem. We also asked a very confused convoy commander if we could take a pic of Bananas the Monkey on the hood of his vehicle. He said yes of course, but I'm not sure he really understood the question.

 

 Everyone loves Thursdays!  And mint lemonade.

 

Welcome to Kabul!

We have a new pilot-type LNO here - they rotate every two weeks. This one is pretty ok. And this one can eat. Like, lists meals like a hobbit, can eat. I noted such to the guy that was here before him:

"- srsly. every third mIRC message I get is about how he's hungry.

it's impressive.

- i knew you'd like him."

I'm not sure how that follows, but ok. *raises eyebrow

I also had hayfever this week which was delightful. I sat at my computer one whole morning in sunglasses looking stupid, because I couldn't take the light. Which meant I couldn't see anything I was typing. It's good I survived the day.

Yesterday I just wanted to get into a fight. Like, just lay out and hit someone and fight til I was exhausted. And then my dried fruit arrived! Which helped a little bit. So. Much. Fruit. omnomnomnom. I am rationing myself so I don't inhale it. 'Cause I totally could.

The things we learned this week:

- I can make phone calls! I tried to call the parents, who did not answer. I left a message. "You're probably at chick-fil-a" ...NAILED IT.
- My instructor in my masters class hasn't given me feedback on my proposal yet, with a lit review due in less than a week. Ok. If you don't care about my paper, I don't either...
- Sleeping in on Friday doesn't make Friday all that much better, but it makes Thursday way more relaxed and awesome.
- I should probably get used to the fact that this is not the real world, and that of all the people I befriend here, most of them probably won't keep in touch and will forget pretty quickly. How much can really stick with people whose entire lifestyle is to pick up and go, constantly? I'm probably weird in how important people are to me. How vaguely depressing. *ends random introspective moment
- When someone else comes up with 'obscure' Star Wars questions every day, I'm the nerd when I know the answers, not him for coming up with the questions. Because that makes sense.

-S.

I'm fresh out of witty titles at the moment.

Quote of the week:

On Syria: "Psh. We're like the MacGyver of international politics. Give me Girl Scout cookies, PowerPoint, and a Bible and I could fix the world."

Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass quotes came up again this week.  They're just so good.  It wasn't even me this time.

In other news: "Borrowing" the noisiest 4-wheeler ever (complete with flashing light on top of course) and joyriding around base at 11pm? Great times. Random hilarious times are the best ones here. It doesn't have to make sense.

Yeah, I know the post is picture/quote heavy this week.  I love reading, and you have to deal with the fallout.

And I've been able to read more since my routine changed a bit. I finished The Past Through Tomorrow. It reminds me of both Reynolds and Asimov, somehow. It's excellent. If you like sci-fi, alternate history, or psychology you should go read it.

So it was a week where we went to extremes on the working situation front.  There was one really busy 18 hour period, which was busy for unfortunate reasons, and I did get a random tasker from people with lots of stars which was fun.  I love stuff like that - you have 2 hours to solve this problem and oh none of the data is available from any one source so go figure out which five people you have to talk to, and do some math.  ReadySetGo!  :)  I'm not even joking.  I need a job where my job is doing random taskers and putting out fires.  And work arounds.  Goodness do I do work arounds.  Which I suppose makes up for the fact that certain other people just...stop doing stuff.  Er...no.  Not only is there a solution, there's probably a simple solution.

Because, observation: It does not always have to be that complicated.  Talking about it for 20 minutes instead of asking the question you need to solve the problem isn't going to help.  And jamming a 10 second answer into 90 is going to make me stop listening.  le sigh.

My new policy.

On the other hand, there was one day where I spent 20 minutes transposing the complete results of a NASCAR race and lyrics from "Holding Out for a Hero" into mIRC for a friend. THAT. BORED.

That was the day I emailed JBAB and asked for Rosetta Stone Arabic.  Which they apparently don't have.  BUT - the deployment support people are apparently super awesome and went looking at Andrews.  Who only gives it to people actually assigned to Andrews...so instead she went and found, and signed me up for, a different program that I can access here during work online.  For reals.  That was seriously fantastic. Go JBAB deployment support!

 Tasty.

 

Stuff we learned!

- Long day extra hours are the longest not because they're extra, but because they're the most useless.
- Chili spiced mangoes are a thing.  Not bad, but not particularly good.  And I know exactly one person who will eat a bag of them. 
- On the other hand, let's not talk about how much money I just spent on dried fruit.
- I'm going to have to start writting things down.  I'm forgetting things I normally wouldn't.  That's new, and frustrating.
- Three people this week have called me a "good girl".  I didn't actually learn anything from this.  But...when did it become a thing?
- This is why girls should not go to the gym in groups: 
*hot guy walks to the treadmills past four girls on the rowing machines* 
*two of the girls look across at each other and commence commentary* 
And I quote: "He's so hot!  He needs to be tagged for migratory purposes." 
*this continues for ten minutes*
I again quote: "Do I need to go running?  I feel like I need to go running." 
*Sarah: //facepalm*

-S.

The CJOC floor needs more chair dancing.

Quote of the week:

"It's all about the shiny objects." - CJOC Director, a full bird Colonel

          It's funny 'cause it's true.

I totally met a Turkish guy named Aslan this week.  I managed to not actually squeal at him, but I nearly lost my cool.  For reals.

Also saw a camel spider for the first time, which was much less exciting.  Those suckers are just sorta weird and unnecessary looking.

After hearing some of my co-workers go on and on about these peanut butter filled pretzels they had, I tried some.  And they are essentially crack.  I don't even know why.  I think they're from Costco.  Do yourself a favor and go find them.

Unless you're on a diet.  Then don't.  You've been warned.

The minion mafia arrived!!  They have been deployed throughout the office strategically.  I'm not sure how people put up with my shenanigans so well, but they appear to be embracing them.  PLUS they super useful in getting Maj Hatch all riled up, which is hilarious.  She's threatened like 3 people already.  Note that I'm only brave enough to encourage this because I don't actually work in the office and everything in that section gets blamed on Dan anyway.

The medical guy next to me has decided I don't drink enough water and has taken to getting me a bottle of water when he gets himself one, and then placing it emphatically on my desk while giving me a pointed look.  This story is for you, youknowwhoyouare.

It has been quite a slow week, workwise.  I worked on my thesis proposal, despite my lack of motivation, and now I'm letting it sit before I proof it again.  One of the guys here offered to proof it for me but I feel like it's probably bad enough that I don't want the judgment which would ensue (and he doesn't wear a boonie hat, so I can't even just refuse it).

Things we learned this week:

- I miss singing.  Really miss it.  Like, it hurts a little.
- I need to learn to surf.  (this doesn't actually qualify as learning I suppose, but it didn't fit anywhere else)
- Once one gets used to 2x a days, it almost becomes necessary in order to get to sleep at nite.  dangit.
- Speaking of which, that earlier learning about not running with fast people?  Didn't stick.  My ankles hurt.  sigh.
- This has actually been updated every week.  I'm vaugely impressed with myself.

This has been a somewhat boring update tho.  Sorry.  Here is a picture to amuse you.

 

-S.



Reverse bear crawls should not be a thing.

Quote of the week:

"Just as my luf for you sparkles like...sparkly sheep poop."

Yup.  (bah)(L)

What up people, I'm still here and of sound mind and body.  Per usual, anyway.  My week was very odd.  I mean, for here at least.  Several times I had those "...what..what day is it, even?" moments.  People I was particularly fond of left, new people came, my routine has been thrown the whole week because of meetings, I'm back on 12 hour shifts, it was a week where someone I didn't think had such a varying personality has been swinging between cool and being hyper-emotional/treating me like I'm an idiot, and I straight up thought I was going to pass out on Thursday - I didn't.  Go me.  So the whole "nevertheless..." thing was a bit difficult this week.  I'm trying tho.  I made sure that despite meetings I got in a work out last nite and watched an episode of The Newsroom and made sure not to throw things.  I had an irrational desire to pitch my apple core as hard as I could across the DFAC at lunch today.  It was weird.  But woosah.  Staying positive.  Smiles.  It's just one weird week.  It's the things you take for granted.

The Newsroom - I think I've figured out part of why I like this show, in addition to the witty and fast paced and hilarious dialogue (which in and of itself makes the show worth it).  But it's also so idealistic. They get away with trying to fix things in a way which would never get two feet towards the door in the real world. I want to be Mac. But even as a baby Captain I may already be too jaded to be naive enough to believe I can change things and actually do something about it. But then sometimes I get the feeling that my naiveté (Because I'm fully aware that I've still got a lot of that going on. I'm not THAT beat down yet.  Damn the man, save the empire…) makes other people think maybe I can, tho. The ones that tell me I'm not allowed to retire as a major.  And that's encouraging.  I think.

"I am and I always will be the optimist, the hoper of far-flung hopes and the dreamer of impossible dreams." 
-The Doctor

I was the first call for an event this week.  That was fun, and the whole thing actually went pretty smoothly and all the info got it where it needed to go.  Also, in an unrelated note, briefed the 2-star the other day.  That was fun.

Third Roommate Update: So we had a roomie for like two hours and then she dissappeared.  She had TOO much stuff to fit into a room even normally, I think, and she didn't want to sleep on a top bunk (which was gonna happen) so she volunteered to be in a tent where she has more space and her own area and such.  win-win-win, all around.

Plus I got such good care packages again this week!! It was awesome.  As someone else said, the one from my parents was like a delicious mini-Cracker Barrel gift shop in a box (I share. My mom raised me right.).  People lit up when they saw the moon pies (ok, I only shared half of those. same with the goo goo clusters. mmmmm.).   And the socks and owl stickers are awesome too.  I didn't know they even made socks in such neon colors.  And from Jeff and Lisa, Nutella (that lasted all of 3 minutes) and soup and little awesome useful things! And TEAAAAAAAA.  And my teapot.  Bring on the cold weather.  Thank you lovely people!

For one of the people that left at crossfit, we did a special workout.  It hurt.

Reverse bear crawls are possibly the second worst thing to do EVAR, right behind sit-up-wallballs.

This week we learned:

- Malaria pills can give you weird dreams.  Like, I'm confusing them with real life weird.
- Rest days are good. Rest weeks are much more iffy.
- I want a 1961 Jaguar E-Type.
- Despite having nothing but time to kill, I'm thoroughly unmotivated on the Master's class stuff.  Also, "ok" is not feedback, Mr. professor dude.
- The Captains are going to be the ones who don't freak out about briefing a General.  Intriguing.
- I may or may not have picked my capstone paper topic more than 25% based on my desire to try to work in the phrase "the fourth estate."

- I do not handle other people's unnecessary panic well.  I react by going in the totally opposite direction and being so non-phased and uncaring that it just annoys the panicked people even more.  I also then decide that if they cared what I thought about the situation they'd ask, and I start limiting my answers to "ok" and "yessir."  This is probably not a good reaction.

-S.